Sober
by Bloodyravenheart13
Summary: After the fight with the Brother Hood of evil, Jinx still doesn't know where she belongs. She is stuck on the thin line between good and evil. She askes Kid flash for three months... Away from him, away from Jump city, away from everything. Can she make up her mind about where she truly belongs?


**Another Flinx songfic. I'm such a nerd Xd**

**I do not own Teen Titans**

_And I don't know  
This could break my heart or save me  
Nothing's real  
Until you let go completely  
So here I go with all my thoughts I've been saving  
So here I go with all my fears weighing on me_

I told him I needed to be alone. Even after helping the Titans with the Brotherhood of Evil. I still didn't know where I belonged in the world. I knew I was in love with him. That's why I had to leave. If he was with me every second. It might cloud my judgment on whether I wanted to be a hero or villian. How could know what I truly wanted if I let him be by my side every second. I made him promise to leave me alone for three months. I needed that tome alone. Away from the Hive Five, away from Jump City, away from him. It took a while to convince him. But somehow I did.

Now I had ti go three months without him. Without stealing. And without savinig people as a hero. I needed to find myself. As much as I hate admitting it. I'm scared. What if he's wrong. What if I can't be good. After helping the titans out, my career as a villian is over. I'm going to be a laughing stalk. Did I really do the right thing? The hive five were the only family I ever had. And I betrayed them... and for what? A good looking hero who gave me a rose and told me I could do better? How pathetic.

I neede this time. I just hope it will be enough.__

Three months and I'm still sober  
Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers  
But I know it's never really over

It's been a month. He has kept his promise half way. I never see him. But i always see the roses he leaves me. I'm slowly re-making myself. I got a job as a waitress. Do you know how hard it is to be nice to _every _costumer! I want to hex them sometimes... But a _hero_ woudn't do that, so I'm stuck.

I know I can't forget my past as villian. I can never cleanse myself of all the horrible things I've done. I still don't know who to be... Or what to do. The roses don't help either. But i keep everyone though. It makes me feel... less embty. If you can believe. A flower making me feel less alone. Kinda sad really. Or maybe it's not the flower. But the person who leaves them for me. Cause I know even when I can't see him. He's never far away.

_And I don't know  
I could crash and burn but maybe  
At the end of this road I might catch a glimpse of me  
So I won't worry about my timing, I want to get it right  
No comparing, second guessing, no not this time_

I don't know if I can make it as a hero. Like I said my power is _bad luck_. It causes nothing but grief and distruction. And those losers who say its not the power its the person. They can all go and shove that up there ass. They never knew me, Never knew how _bad_ bad kuck can be.

I could lose everthing if something goes wrong. My powers could kill the rperson i was trying to save... What kind of hero would that make me? The titans would have me out on my butt in no time. They woudn't feel bad about it either, let me tell you. I guess I can't blame them. After all the shit I've done to them.

What a time to be good though. Whe the Brother Hood of Evil finally ecnologed my exsistance. I guess bad luck comes with bad timing. What now? Where do go? Who do I be? One misstep and my life can be over. I guess it's tok late though to rethink my actions...

__

Three months and I'm still breathing  
Been a long road since those hands I left my tears in but I know  
It's never really over, no  


It's been two months now. I'm still alive... barley. I got fired from my job as a waitress. Apperantly pouring hot coffe over a guys head is a no no. Even if the guy was making sexiest jokes and rude comments to his waitress. What a world we live in. So now I'm a jobless girl on the thin border line between hero and villian. Just great. One word... _loser._

I can't help recall how I let myself cry infront of Kid Flash. I _never_ cry. But just a few sweet words and one perfect rose and he's holding me to his chest and I;m soking his uniform with my tears. Just great. One word for that... _Weak._

But each rose that shows up at my front door, on my bed, in my hand. I can't forget him. As much as I'd like too. He changed me when no one cold. He broke away my stone heart and changed me. For better or worse... i still don't know. I gave everythinh up for him. Two word for this one..._ Love sick._

_Wake up  
Three months and I'm still standing here  
Three months and I'm getting better yeah  
Three months and I still am_

It's hard waking up from a nightmare. The darkness never leaves you. Even when your eyes open. The things about dreams and nightmares. The dreams you can forget, the nightmares you can't. They become a part of you. Living inside you. Following every step you take. Day after day.

You never can forget the dark pat. But a future of light can surpress the memories. But onlu surpress... Light will never fully out shine the dark.

I can be a hero all I want. But My evil deeds of the past will follow me where ever I go. I jst hope Kid Flash will be ther eto help me lessan the dark. With his ever shinging light.

_Three months and it's still harder now  
Three months I've been living here without you now  
Three months yeah, three months_

It's hard living without him. Eveyday waking only to roses, but not to him. Sometimes I wish I asked him to stay with me for this time to think. But the thought is quicky discarted. How could I make my decsion with him there. I didn't want my life to be altered only for him. But for me.

I do love him. I have admitted this to only myself. But hey, I'll tell him when he gets the balls to say it to me first. Sure he's annoying, cocky, and an idiot.

I miss him.__

Three months and I'm still breathing  
Three months and I still remember it  
Three months and I wake up

Three months now. I'm not turning back. Villian will no longer be who I am. Hero may not completley define me. But it will be me. Three months and I'm still me. Just diffrent. Better... Stronger...

But I won't let myself be oly remembered for being a hero. Or my past as a villian. I will be remembered for being me. Jinx.

Three months and I'm still me. Just diffrent.__

Three months and I'm still sober  
Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers

It's good to be side by side agian. It's going to take a while to gain the trust of all the other titans. But his trust is all I need. Him and his roses.

**I hope you like it!**

**Please review XD**


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